


here's looking at you (here's longing for you, dear)

by Casutama



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, M/M, Pining, Politics, Poor Aaron Burr, so much pining
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-01
Updated: 2017-05-01
Packaged: 2018-10-26 17:42:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,382
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10791525
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Casutama/pseuds/Casutama
Summary: Aaron feels like he has spent the better part of his life, certainly from college onward, staring at Alexander from a distance. The guy is a force of nature. Always has been. Watching him is like watching a hurricane; its remarkable force and power scare you, but it renders you so much in awe that you can’t avert your eyes.Aaron watches Hamilton from afar. For purely political purposes. Of course. And can't look away. (Modern AU)





	here's looking at you (here's longing for you, dear)

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first time I'm actually posting anything on AO3, which is amazing, seeing as I've been a member for at least 4 years now...  
> I have absolutely no time at the moment, but I had to write this fanfiction.  
> It is also my first contribution to this fandom, and I hope you'll like it.
> 
> Seeing as my schedule is beyond full at the moment, I don't know when I will find the time to continue this story. I would promise that it definitely 100% will be continued and finished, but so many authors have promised that, and if a study were done, I'd be surprised if it found that more than a maximum of 50% of them actually stuck to that, so I'll only promise to try.
> 
> Also, please be aware that English is not my first language, so the writing will probably be a bit clumsy at times, I'm sorry! In this case, that also means that I am not American. I will, of course, do my research, but I can't promise that I won't ever get anything wrong about the American political system.
> 
> Ah, and of course:  
> Disclaimer: No, I don't own Hamilton, or the soundtrack (except for my copy of the album which I purchased a year ago), the characters belong a little bit to history (which means, to themselves) and a lot to the writers of Hamilton, and I am just borrowing them and parts of their world. I promise that it will all be returned unharmed in the end. I'm also not looking to make money by writing this, I'm simply doing this for fun (and not selling each paragraph for thousands of dollars with a one year waiting period like other people).
> 
> Finally: Comments = love

He watches Hamilton storm angrily away. Jefferson next to him says something, probably something smug, but Aaron is too busy staring after Hamilton to catch what he’s saying. It seems impossible that he will be able to forget the expression on his face, both infuriated and determined, or the nearly betrayed look that almost pierced Aaron’s soul when Hamilton glanced briefly at him before exiting the room.

“… hey, Burr, you okay?”

Madison’s voice seems to come from far away, but Aaron snaps back into reality. He puts on his most convincing fake smile. Which is, as he knows from experience, very convincing.

“I’m just exhausted. Glad this is settled though.”

At least the first part of his statement is actually true. Getting the new immigration guidelines passed was the main focus of their work throughout the past few months. Today, finally, Congress voted on it. It was a fairly close vote, but they won.

It surprised even Aaron.

He doesn’t know what Jefferson did behind the scenes – and there is no doubt in his mind that Jefferson is definitely involved in this to some degree – to make this happen, but whatever it was, it was effective. Nobody counted on the legislation being defeated by a huge margin, but almost everyone Aaron spoke to prior to the vote seemed to think that it was a done deal that it _would_ be defeated. No wonder Hamilton is devastated.

Not so Madison and Jefferson. Especially Jefferson, who has been feuding with Hamilton for as long as anyone can remember.

“Did you see the look on his face?” The glee in Jefferson’s voice almost makes Aaron puke. Jefferson maybe doesn’t care, or maybe he doesn’t know Hamilton well enough to even remark on it, but although it was overshadowed by fury, frustration and resolve earlier, there had been a profound layer of anguish and distress in Hamilton’s expression.

“We mustn’t celebrate a victory we haven’t won yet”, interjects Madison, furrowing his enormous eyebrows as he is looking at Jefferson.

“Not even Daddy’s boy can always get what he wants”, retorts Jefferson and smirks. “If we gather enough public support for this bill, Washington will have to sign it, whether he wants to or not.” Aaron doesn’t believe for a second that that’s all that Jefferson is counting on. But if he has anything else up his sleeve, he doesn’t seem to be in the mood to share it at the moment.

He used to think that Jefferson’s dislike for Hamilton stemmed from jealousy. Hamilton, for all of his flaws and self-dug holes, is practically like a son to President Washington, and the President has been known to have little patience for anyone else.  
Now of course, Aaron knows that Jefferson couldn’t care less for the President’s affections. It needs two particularly stubborn people though to create the sort of rivalry - that would have once been called arch rivalry - that exists between Hamilton and Jefferson simply because of differing ideologies. Sure, opinion-wise they don't have much in common, in fact, they rarely see eye to eye on any issue in politics. As far as Aaron is concerned, though, that's no reason to despise anyone. If he hated everyone who disagreed with him so passionately, there wouldn't be many people left with that he does or could like, Aaron muses. Then again, of course, Hamilton probably counts that as a bonus. Aaron knows that Jefferson definitely does.

Speaking of Jefferson; he and Madison are still discussing their victory. "We should go out and celebrate", Jefferson says, and Aaron takes this as his cue to leave. There is nothing h feels like less than to celebrate the passing of a bill that he still feels conflicted about. He bids his goodbyes from them earlier than usual and heads home. They stopped long ago to ask him to join them for a drink after Congress. It seems they have accepted that he is a private person. That’s true as well, but mostly, Aaron just doesn’t want to spend more time around them than strictly necessary.

 

*~*~*

 

Aaron feels like he has spent the better part of his life, certainly from college onward, staring at Alexander from a distance. The guy is a force of nature. Always has been. Watching him is like watching a hurricane; you can’t help but notice its force and power, maybe it scares you, but it renders you so much in awe that you can’t avert your eyes.

That’s how Hamilton has always been for Aaron. In his own way, he knows Alexander is dangerous. Fascinating, definitely, but dangerous. Like a storm. Like fire. He is capable of emitting warmth and light, but you never know when he will burn those around him thoughtlessly, leaving destruction in his wake. So Aaron watches from afar. He has – mostly successfully – tried to keep away. They were close, once. Very briefly. Aaron tells himself he doesn’t regret pulling back and regaining his distance. His wandering eyes tell a different story.

Nowadays they talk little. Sometimes, Aaron wonders if Hamilton still remembers he even exists. He knows him well enough to be aware that Hamilton has little space in his head for anyone and anything that isn’t directly linked to or relevant for his work; and although Burr is now a Senator – has been for some time – they rarely cross paths. In fact, the last conversation he remembers them having lies several years back; back when Burr had only just become a Senator and Alexander had berated – no, screamed at him for stealing his father-in-law’s seat in the Senate. It had been less of a conversation and more of a shouting match, really, at least on Hamilton’s part. He himself, of course, had never lost his calm. He has a reputation to uphold, after all.

 

*~*~*

 

It’s not that he doesn’t understand why Hamilton is upset with the new legislation. It’s hard on immigrants, makes it more difficult to get into the country, to get legal paperwork, it ups the bureaucracy. It also severely limits the amount of immigrants they will let in. Given his background, of course he was going to be devastated.

So he gets it.

He still thinks Hamilton is overreacting. There is a pretty good chance that the bill will never go into effect. It is now the President’s turn to look at it, and Aaron would be shocked if George Washington didn’t veto it, or at least demand serious alterations. Nevermind the fact that Alexander is his protégé – Washington has strong progressive opinions on immigration himself, it’s an issue that has continuously been important to him throughout his presidency and it was more or less the centerpiece of his last campaign. There is no way that he will go back on all of his promises and beliefs now just because of something Jefferson did.

Unless, of course, Hamilton knows something Aaron doesn’t.

As Secretary of the Treasury, that’s entirely possible. Whatever it is, if Hamilton knows it – if there even is anything to know – Jefferson knows it too. And has probably told Madison.

Aaron has never been jealous of Hamilton’s position. He knows that he could never fill that post quite as well. Hamilton’s really perfect for it. Both for the actual task and the power and the somewhat equivocal fame that come with it. Which Hamilton is perfect for because he cares not one iota for either, he just wants to make the most of his time, have as big of an impact as he possibly can. Aaron is also half-convinced that his other goal is to annoy as many people as possible while building his legacy. Or maybe Alexander counts annoying others as one of the many ways in which he strives to make an impact.

He’s not jealous of the position, not of the fame and not even the power. But what Aaron has been striving for his entire life is not so much making an impact as simply being in the know and deducing the most strategic course of action from there. He became a Senator to be more included in decision-making processes and to get a foot in the door. But still, even now, Hamilton always seems to be in the Room when _he_ is not. And Aaron is sick of it.


End file.
